


Black Ops

by jedi_fish81



Category: Star Wars Episode IV: A New Hope, Star Wars Original Trilogy
Genre: Alternate Universe, F/F, F/M, M/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-08-06
Updated: 2017-09-22
Packaged: 2018-12-11 17:40:22
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 4
Words: 13,173
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11719263
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/jedi_fish81/pseuds/jedi_fish81
Summary: As with anything I own nothing, all characters and settings are licensed to Lucasfilm LTD.  This is an AU that takes place immediately following the Battle of Yavin.





	1. Blood

Han celebrated with Luke and the rest of the Rogue Squadron after the battle of Yavin and the unbelievable destruction of the Death Star. They drank until they were giddy and sang old space shanties from their home worlds. Han felt apart of something bigger than himself for the first time in his life. He knew that eventually he'd need to leave to pay off Jabba, but he wasn't going anywhere anytime soon. 

"Han." Luke laughed his farm boy innocent blue eyes glassy from far too little Corellian whiskey and spiced ale. "Have you seen the Princess?" 

"No." He looked around, he hadn't. He'd bought her some clothes to change into so she could get out of her garbage chute stained gown and given her the code to the Falcon so she could use the fresher. She'd left over an hour ago promising to be back. "Stay here." He got up and steadied himself. He wondered if she'd had trouble with the new code. He'd had to change it after the Rogues got in and fresher papered the cockpit, he had to make sure that their cover wasn't blown until they were told differently. Sure, Leia had some things on the Falcon from their past missions but after what shed been through on the Death Star, he wanted to get her something new and clean to wear. He knew she'd lied in her debriefing, there was no way she'd gotten out unscathed. 

He wasn't sure if he should be worried or angry as he walked down the corridor, his gut, his gut that was almost never wrong told him to worry and that worry made him jog. As a former Imperial, he knew the torture tactics of the Empire, he knew what they'd done to her, even if she never spoke of it to him. He knew that as soon as the adrenaline wore off she was going hurt, and hurt a lot physically and mentally. "Shit." He spoke sprinting the last few yards. She was crumpled, still in her court gown, at the bottom of the ramp. "Leia." He spoke feeling his throat tighten. She hadn't even gotten on board, she'd been here on the ground for well over an hour. "Leia." He spoke dropping to his knees next to her crumpled lifeless body. He found her pulse, it was stronger than he expected but her breathing was wrong, desperate as if her airway was blocked. He moved her onto her back and checked for something in her throat or a swelling caused by an allergic reaction and then he saw it, bloody foam leaking out of the corner of her mouth. She had a punctured lung in the very least, no telling what else. He scooped her up in his arms. "Just hang on sweetheart, I'm going to get you some help." He spoke gently, he was surprised at how little she weighed as he ran through the base cradling her close to his chest so her head wouldn't flop around. 

"Han?" She gasped as he ran the movement bringing her around. 

"Don't talk just breathe." 

"Han, please... listen to me." She reached up and stroked his cheek. "Please, you've got to. Han I'm dying." 

He stopped running and looked into her eyes. "No, no you're not." 

"Just listen to me." She she fought for air. 

"I'm not going to let you die Leia." 

"Maybe it's for the best." 

"No."

"Han... you know I love you..."

"Don't do that, don't you dare." He spoke and started running again. "Don't you dare say goodbye to me." 

She coughed and vomited blood all over him. It was more than a punctured lung, she was right, she was dying. 

"Medic!" He shouted as he ran. "Hold on Lei we're almost there." He spoke his legs burning. "Gods Lei, hold on. Medic!" He shouted as he ran into the lobby of the infirmary. Every medic in the area seemed to rush into action as he ran in with her lifeless body in his arms and the blood she'd vomited, in a moment of consciousness all down the front of him and the tears he couldn't hide. 

"What happened Captain Solo?" The head medic asked him as she was moved from his arms to a gurney. 

"She's dying." Han spoke as he looked at her too pale face and the dark bruises that had been hidden by her makeup until it had rubbed off on his shirt in transit. He looked at the blood on places that it shouldn't be on her gown, places that suggested torture. "I uh, I bought her some clothes, you know I felt sorry for the kid, here she's lost her entire world and she's running around in a gown that smells like a garbage chute. And um, I gave her the code to the Falcon, 'cause she doesn't have quarters here yet and, you know I thought a hot shower would do some good, you know? And I was in the cantina with Capitan Skywalker and it occurred to both of us that she had been gone too long. So, I went to find her. And I found her alright, crumpled at the base of the ramp to the Falcon, she'd gotten it open but never gotten onboard." 

"Was she attacked?" The head medic asked taking a preliminary mental inventory of her injuries. 

"No, not here." He spoke walking with the head medic as Leia was taken down a sterile looking hallway. "I'm pretty sure you'll find evidence of extreme torture at the hands of Tarkin and the other Imperials. I know, I used to be one, I was Court Martialed and almost executed because I couldn't do to someone what was done to her." He cleared his throat uncomfortably. "Make sure she gets an emergency contraceptive. Just in case, I know what they're capable of, it's best to handle it now than have her relive it all over again in a few weeks." 

"Yes, sir." The medic nodded. "Well, we'll take it from here." 

"No, no way. I want her to see that she's not alone. I'll wait around where she can see me, and I'll be in her hospital room when she wakes up and every day until she's released. She just lost everyone she's ever known and loved, and I'll be damned if she's going to face the atrocities she suffered alone." 

Han leaned against the wall in the hallway watching the medics work on Leia through the glass window into the urgent care suite. He watched them cut her gown off and cut a hole in her side for a chest tube, air rushed out of the tube and he knew he'd been right. She was so bruised and bloodied and burned that he could hardly tell that she was wearing nothing at all. The medics quickly covered her with a sheet and continued to work. He watched them sedate her and put in a breathing tube, prepping her for some sort of surgical procedure. 

Luke barreled down the hall with medics and EMDEE droids trailing after him trying to stop him. "Han!" 

He looked at him, his eyes tired and soft damper than he meant for them to be. "Yeah, kid?" He spoke stepping back into the smuggler he was pretending to be. The man Luke knew, the man who was a stranger to Leia. 

"I went to look for you and the Princess and I saw blood by the Falcon." Luke spoke catching his breath, as if he'd run at top speed all the way from the Falcon. 

Han turned his body toward him and Luke saw the blood stains down the front of him. 

"Where's the Princess?" 

Han pointed his thumb at the observation window. 

Luke just stared at medics working on Leia. 

"She was probably tortured on the Death Star." Han spoke breaking up the deafening silence between he and Luke. "When I found her she had made it to the Falcon, but had collapsed at the bottom of the ramp. When I rolled her onto her back and saw the bloody foam leaking out of the corner of her mouth. I'd guess that she had broken ribs and one of them had somehow punctured her lung. It could have been something as simple as twisting wrong or reaching... I don't know kid, I do know she's in rough shape." 

Luke nodded. 

Han turned back and watched the medic's work on Leia. She was fighting them, hard. "Shit." 

"Captain Solo." One of the medics shouted as he rushed in. "You can't be in here." 

"She was tortured you idiot, you have to talk to her tell her what you're doing, she thinks she's back on the fucking Death Star." He spoke pushing past the medic and to Leia's side. "Leia." He placed his hand on her forehead gently. "Look at me." He spoke as she thrashed around. 

Leia's dark eyes were full of terror as she looked at him. 

"Hey, sweetheart, calm down you're safe. You're on Yavin. I found you collapsed in the hangar and brought you here for help." 

Her eyes teared up. 

"I'm not going to leave you, I'll be here the whole time, but you've got to let these medics take care of you or you're going to die." 

She mumbled around the breathing tube. 

"I know you're scared. I"m scared too, but it's going to be okay." 

She nodded. 

"I'll stay okay?" 

She nodded. 

"When you wake up the first thing you'll see is me, okay?" 

She nodded. 

"Captain Solo, you've got to move back." 

He kissed her forehead. "I'll be right out there, okay?" 

She nodded. 

"Let them do their jobs, let them help you." He pointed to the view ports. "You see that glass? I'll be right out there the whole time." 

She nodded. 

Luke just stared at Han as he leaned against the wall back in the hallway and just watched. Every now and then Leia would strain to sit up enough to make sure he was still there. "And here I didn't think you liked her very much." 

"Look at her Luke, she can't be any older than you and what she's been through..." He trailed off fighting to stay in character. "No wonder she was such a bitch, think about the amount of pain she must have been in." 

"I don't know, I get the feeling that 'bitch' is probably her regular personality." 

Han bristled, his thoughts darkening. 'No one calls her a bitch but me, especially not some dumb farm boy. Fucking kid.' He cleared his thought keeping his thoughts to himself and simply shrugged. "Don't care really, no one deserves to be alone." 

Luke nodded. 

"She must have lied in her debriefing." Han spoke quietly. 

"What makes you say that?" Luke looked at him. 

"I saw her after they cut her out of her gown, before they covered her. She was so bruised and she had so many abrasions... " He sighed. "She's just so small." He looked at his hands stained with her blood. "When I carried her here, it was like I wasn't carrying anything at all." 

Luke raised his eyebrows at him. "You alright Han?" 

"No. No, I'm not. Hour and a half ago she was raising hell with me, you know in a good natured way. I bought her some clothes and she gave me shit for buying her underthings, that gown is all she has left from Alderaan, I've got an autovalet on the Falcon and... shit." He spoke rushing back into the urgent care room. 

"Captain Solo!" The medic warned him. "If you don't knock it off, I'm going to have you banned from this sickbay." 

Han grabbed her gown off the floor and her shoes. "Any other personal effects you take off her, you give to me. This is all she has left from Alderaan." He spoke poking the medic in the chest. 

"Yes, sir. Now, get out of my urgent care room." The medic spoke firmly, matching his intensity. 

Leia watched him as he carried her things carefully out of the room. 

"What the hell has gotten into you Han?" Luke spoke watching him carefully fold Leia's bloody cut-up gown. 

"You ever have your planet destroyed while you were forced to watch?" Han stopped to look at him. 

Luke shook his head. 

"She has." He held up her gown and boots. "This is it. That tiny Princess and this. That's all that's left of Alderaan as far as we know right now, and I'll be damned if I'm going to let her lose what little she has left." 

"They made her watch?" Luke whispered. 

Han nodded. 

"How do you know?" 

Han looked at his boots. "She told me when we were at the marketplace." 

"You're walking kind of slow highnessness." Han spoke gently as they walked together from the celebration to the small marketplace run by the natives. "You alright?" 

"I'm incredibly sore Han." Leia sighed. 

He nodded, he'd been tortured by the Empire too. "I'm sorry." 

She glanced at the side of his face as they walked. 

"The Falcon may not be much to look at but she's got the best hot water in the galaxy." Han made a grand sweeping gesture with his hand as he spoke. 

"Does she?" Leia spoke an air of good natured suspicion in her voice. "You know, I've heard that before..."

"Guaranteed." He smiled at her. "Plenty of water in the tanks too, you could take a nice hot shower and run that gown through the autovalet without problem. 

"Do I get my credits back if your guarantee is wrong?" She joked with him. 

He smiled at her again. "I cook pretty good, if I'm wrong I'll cook you dinner for a month." 

"Uh, Captain Solo?" 

"Yeah?" 

"That means you have to stay for at least a month, no missions." 

He shrugged. "I ain't got nothing pressing to do, might kick around for a while." He slipped his arm around her and pressed his hand gently to the small of her back. 

She gasped sharply through her teeth and he saw pain wash over her. 

"Gods Leia, I'm sorry." He stopped walking and tried to do a visual assessment of her, but her desert gown covered so much of her that he couldn't tell what was broken and what was not. 

"It's okay." She growled from deep in her throat. He was always surprised by how deep and smokey her voice was. 

"Cigarette, Princess?" 

She looked at him as he took a rumpled pack of cigarettes out of his jacket and shook one out lighting it and putt it between her lips. She took a long, deep grateful drag. 

"Better?" 

She nodded. 

He lit a cigarette for himself. 

"Thank you." 

"It's just a cigarette, your highness." 

"No." She spoke taking his hand and lacing her fingers between his. "It's normality. You always treat me like a human, even now when everyone is treating me like a monument to the lost souls of Alderaan." 

"Figured the last thing you need is to be treated like you... like..."

"Like I smell bad, like its my fault." 

He stopped walking and turned his body to face her in the deserted corridor. "It's not your fault. Don't ever let anyone tell you different. And if they do? You come tell me, and I'll make 'em regret it." He flexed his fist. 

"Are you my protector Captain Solo?" She looked up at him. 

He shrugged pulling her into his side gently as they walked. "Always, I'll always protect you." 

"Han?" She spoke quietly, her voice almost a whisper. "They made me watch. They asked me where this base was and I lied, I told them Dantoonie and Tarkin knew and he made me watch. Vader held my head, he used the force to keep me from closing my eyes and he made me watch as everything I've ever known, everyone I've ever loved was obliterated in a second." She finished her cigarette and snuffed out the butt with her boot. "It's my fault Han, I killed all of those people because I wasn't good enough, I didn't lie well enough, I wasn't confident..."

"No, it's not your fault. They were going to do anyway, whether you told them or not. That's how those twisted fuckers work. Especially Tarkin, you remember, he was my commanding officer and when I was Court Martialed, he was also in charge of my torture." Han was sick, he felt his stomach turn and he had an overwhelming desire to vomit. He swallowed hard against the bile rising in his throat and instead just slipped his arms around her gently. He felt her arms wrap around him holding him tight as her hot tears soaked through his shirt. 

"You and Luke should have left me to die." She whispered. "I don't know how to live through this." 

He rubbed her back gently with one hand and cupped the back of her head with the other. "I don't know either Leia, but you won't be alone. Even if your fears come true and everyone abandons you, you can come with me." 

She looked up at him her eyes wet with tears. "Why?" 

"Dunno, guess I like you a little." 

She smiled at him. "I like you too... a little." 

"Don't let that get out, people will talk." 

She laughed a little. "People already talk about us Han."

"Come on sweetheart, let's buy you some underwear." 

"Dirty old man." Leia laughed. 

He laughed. "You shouldn't have left home on such an important mission without your skivvies." 

"Seriously?" Luke looked at him. "You're like, old enough to be my father." 

"Bullshit, we're ten years apart." 

Luke shook his head. "What have you got that I haven't got?" 

Han laughed. "About a half a meter kid." 

Luke scoffed. 

Han stepped forward as the medics pushed out Leia's hover-bed. "Wait." He stopped them. "Where are you taking her?" 

"Surgery and then recovery." The head medic spoke briskly. "She won't be well enough for bacta for a few weeks." 

"And after?" Han questioned him further. 

"Recovery." He spoke simply trying to maneuver around Han. 

He nodded blocking his way.

Leia looked at him, her eyes wide with fear, still fighting the fresh memories from the Death Star. 

Han took her hand in both of his. "Remember sweetheart, when you wake up, this face will be the first thing you see? This face." 

She raised her eyebrows at him. 

"And if I'm wrong?" 

She nodded. 

"Dinner for a month." 

She held up three fingers." 

"Three months?" 

She nodded. 

"Captain Solo, we need to go now, she's bleeding internally." 

Luke shook his head. 

"Before or after you're released?" Han drawled. 

She furrowed her eyebrows at him.

"After." 

She nodded. 

He sighed struggling to stay in character. "I've got to pay off Jabba." 

She furrowed her eyebrows at him again, she could tell that the anesthetic was starting to really get to her by how heavy her eyelids were.

He held his hands up, palms out. "Alright, three months, I promise." 

She closed her eyes.

Han stroked her cheek for too long and his eyes teared up with the thought of losing her. 

"Captain Solo..." The medic spoke again and Han kissed her forehead. 

"Enjoy your nap Princess." He turned to the medics. "Remember, she's just been through an unimaginable amount of trauma, be careful with her." 

Luke watched Han watch the medics steer the hover-bed through a set of doors. 

"You!" Han pointed to the medic that stayed behind. 

The medic jumped. "Yes, Captain Solo?" 

"Take me to where she'll be when she wakes up." 

"Yes sir." 

"Luke?" Han spoke. "You coming?" 

He nodded jogging to catch up with Han and the medic. 

"Are you really going to stay?" Luke spoke as they sat in an empty waiting room. 

"I made a promise didn't I?" Han spoke looking at the floor. 

"Yeah, but..."

"I don't break promises kid." Han looked at him. "I've had too many people break their promises to me to do that to her." 

"You know that she'll see the ceiling first." Luke spoke nonchalantly. 

"Don't matter." Han shrugged. "Still gonna stay, even if she saw me first." 

"And Jabba?" 

"Gotta make enough money to pay him before I can go anyway." 

"Your reward?" 

"I'm giving it back." He looked at Luke. "You want to do something for me, or for her rather?" 

"What?" Luke looked at him. 

"There's a bag of women's clothes by the ramp of the Falcon." Han scrubbed the back of his neck. "I don't want people getting the wrong idea." 

"I took it inside and locked up before I came here." Luke assured him. 

"Thanks kid." Han patted his back gently. 

He nodded. "You think she'll be okay?" 

"Physically sure, eventually." Han sighed. "Her head's gonna be fucked up for a long time, maybe the rest of her life." 

Luke nodded. "So, you're going to enlist?" 

"Already did, after I took her to the marketplace. I don't give a damn about your little rebellion kid." He lied, that wasn't quite the truth but Leia was the lead on this operation and he wasn't willing to blow their cover without her express permission. "But I know that that these folks don't give a damn about her, but I do. Someone has to watch over her." 

"You are her protector, aren't you?" 

He nodded. 

"Han, do me a favor... do her a favor." Luke spoke, he'd heard of Jabba's ruthlessness form living on Tatoonie his entire life. "Keep enough of your reward to pay him off, then pay the rebellion back. He'll kill you, then what good will you be to her?" 

Han nodded. "Good point." 

"Your bounty puts her in danger." Luke spoke simply. 

He nodded chewing on his thumbnail.


	2. The Farm Boy

Leia awoke slowly opening her eyes to the ceiling. She reached up and felt for the breathing tube. It was gone, leaving in it's place a scratchy, sore throat from her fighting in the ER and a nasal cannula. She remembered flirting with Han in the market place, like normal and him being wonderful while she was frightened in the ER, but she didn't remember much else. She turned her head, gods she was so sore. Han was sound asleep in a chair. She smiled at the female medic who was coming in to check on her. 

"He's been here for hours, your Highness." The female medic spoke quietly. "How do you feel?" 

"Sore." She breathed. "Gods, I just hurt so much." 

"I'm sorry, we've given you something for pain." 

"Of course you did." Leia nodded. "What else did you give me?" 

"Fluids, blood units from Captain Solo and Captain Skywalker, antibiotics, anti-nausea, pain killers, and emergency contraceptive, your Highness." 

Leia nodded looking at her hands. 

Han pretended to be a sleep so that Leia could think that he hadn't heard that last part. She'd tell him everything when she was ready and he would pretend it was new, especially when she told him what the emergency contraceptive inferred, and what he knew to be true without asking. He'd requested it for her, he'd been an Imperial and knew Tarkin's favorite torture tactics. 

"Is that my blood all over him?" Leia gestured to the dark stains down the front of Han's shirt. 

The medic nodded. "He carried you here in his arms and he refuses to change until he sees that you're okay, your Highness, even though I promised to let him back in." 

Leia smiled in his direction. 

"He must really care about you." The medic marveled. 

"He does." Leia spoke simply. 

"Get some rest, your highness." The medic spoke. "You made it through surgery, that was the first big step." 

Leia nodded. 

The medic gave her an encouraging smile. 

"What's you're name?" 

"Dansa." 

"Dansa, just call me Leia." 

She nodded. "I'll try, Your Highness." 

"Will you be taking care of me today?" 

"Yes, I am in charge of your care." 

Leia smiled at her. "I look forward to getting to know you. I know I'm going to be here a long time." 

Dansa smiled at her. "Comm if you need anything." 

"Han?" Leia spoke quietly after the medic had left. 

He made a show of groaning and stretching as if he'd been asleep the entire time. 

She smiled at him, knowing he was faking, knowing he'd heard everything but appreciating the courtesy. 

"You're awake." He sat up. 

She nodded. 

"What was the first thing you saw when you opened you eyes?" He leaned forward and took her hand

"The ceiling." She spoke flatly. 

"Kriff. Guess you're stuck with me." He shrugged. 

She smiled at him. "I've been stuck with you for a while now. Good thing I like you." 

"How do you feel?" Han spoke smoothing her hair. 

"I'm so tired." She yawned. 

"Sleep." He spoke simply. 

She shook her head. "Not right now." 

"You need to rest." Han spoke gently. 

"Actually, I need you to go change, seeing my blood all over you is really freaking me out." 

"Comm your medic first." 

"Okay." Leia hit the comm button. 

Dansa appeared in room. "Yes?" 

Leia shrugged and pointed to Han. 

"Listen, I wanted to make sure that if I go change, I can get back in." Han spoke firmly. 

"Yes sir. Leia, do you give permission for Captain Solo to have free access to your room?"

"Yes, and only Captain Solo, no one else aside from your medical staff." 

"That's all I needed to hear. Let me get an ID made for you." 

"Thank you." 

Han scooted his chair closer to Leia's bed after Dansa had left. "When I get back would you like me to brush out your hair?" 

"I'd really like that, the pins holding it together are really starting to hurt." 

"It's kind of a rat's nest too." He commented touching one of the buns that her hair was still styled in. 

"I'm sure." 

Dansa came back with a data pad. "Place your right hand here, Captain Solo."

He placed his hand on the screen and watched it scan his handprint. 

"The lock on the door is now programmed to your hand. And..." She spoke snapping a quick holo of him. "Oh good, your details are on file, that makes this so much easier. Alderaanian military. Oh, my mistake General." 

Leia looked at him. 

Han cleared his throat. "Let's keep that between the three of us for now." 

"Yes sir." Dansa printed out an ID badge and clipped it to the lanyard that was hanging around her wrist. "You must wear this at all times here." She handed it to him. 

He nodded pulling it on over his head. "Thank you." 

"You're welcome sir." She turned to go. "Leia, can I get you anything?" 

"My mouth is really dry."

"I'll bring you some ice chips." 

"Thank you." 

"You lied during your debriefing didn't you?" Han spoke holding her hand and wearing fresh clothes. 

Leia nodded. 

"Why?" He stroked her cheek gently. "You could have died." 

She shrugged. "Would have rather died than looked Mon Mothma and General Dodonna in the eye while talking about this." 

Han sighed and raised the head of her bed. 

She winced a bit. 

"You okay?" 

She nodded. 

Han opened one of the bags he'd brought back with him and set a silver hair brush on the bed. 

"Han, you need to stop spending money on me." 

He smiled at her. "Oh, all this? No, had them put it on your account." 

She smiled at him as he carefully untangled the hair pins that were left in her tangled hair. 

"You want me to put it back up like this?" 

Leia laughed. "No, I'll never wear these again." 

"They're not that bad." Han chuckled, he hated the Revolution Buns. 

"It's not that, I..." She started and stopped. "I'm not ready to talk about that just now." 

He nodded being as gentle as he could as he unpinned her hair. 

She shook her head. "I can braid it into something." 

"Oh can you?" He gave her an odd look. 

She nodded. 

"Try lifting your arms high enough to do that. Slowly." 

Leia lifted her arms up. "Oh..." She spoke losing her breath before she could get them too far off her lap. 

"You okay?" 

She shook her head. "That hurt more than I thought it would." 

"I thought it might." 

She took a few deep breaths. "I guess it will have to stay down." 

"Don't worry, I had a little sister." 

"Are you saying I'm like a little sister to you?" 

He chuckled. "No, you're definitely not like a little sister to me." 

She smiled at him. 

He kissed her forehead. "I was implying that I know how to braid hair." 

"Didn't your mother do that?" 

He shook his head. "No, she died when I was six Leia. I kept Kira and I alive on the streets for as long as I could." He looked away and down at the floor. "Unfortunately, she got sick and she was coughing a lot and there was this soldier that was stationed nearby. It annoyed him... I guess, and he shot her Leia." He sighed. "He shot her like a dog in the street." His voice shook. "I tried to get between her and him so he hit me with the butt of his blaster rifle. That's how I got this scar on my chin and then he shot her." 

"How old were you?" Leia asked, her voice barely a whisper. 

"Seven and she was five. I could only keep her alive for a year Leia." He looked at her with that look, that soft around the edges look, his look of vulnerability and trust. 

"You were just a child." Leia spoke gently. 

"I promised my mom that I'd look out for her." He looked at his hands. 

Leia took his hand. "You did your very best Han." 

He nodded. 

"You were just too young." 

He nodded. "I've never told anyone about her before. I haven't even said her name since she died." 

Leia reached out for him to try and offer him some sort of comfort. 

He looked at her as she wiped away the tears that she never expected the Han Solo she knew to cry. "Come close to me." She spoke quietly. 

He slipped his arm around her shoulder and leaned forward. She kissed his temple and pressed her forehead there. "It's not your fault, just like deep down I know that Alderaan wasn't my fault." 

He nodded. "I should be comforting you, not the other way 'round." 

She kissed his cheek. "It's alright." Her voice sounded different, throatier. 

He looked at her their faces too close together. He reached up with his free hand and cupped the side of her face holding her eyes, her skin was so very soft. His face was open, his eyes soft around the edges. He kissed her, he didn't mean to, he didn't even intend to and he wasn't sure she was up for it until realized that she was kissing him back. He felt her thin fingers in the hair at the base of his skull gently reminding him not to pull away. She kissed him as if she drawing strength from it. He shifted his weight and leaned across her body. The kiss ended on its own, Leia was weak and he knew not too make it last too long. 

He just searched her eyes as she ran her fingers through his hair. 

She smiled at him. "What?" 

"I'm not sure you were ready for that." He spoke stroking her cheek. 

"I'm always up for that, Han." She smiled at him. 

He smiled at her and went back to brushing out her hair. 

She laughed. "Just you being here is helping more than you'll ever realize." 

"Because I make you feel normal?" He spoke plucking a few errant pins out of her hair. 

She nodded. "You've always made me feel normal. This is different, you make me feel undamaged, and cared for." 

"You're not damaged." 

She looked at him. "Don't be naive Han, you know what was done to me." 

"None of that makes you damaged." He got up and moved to the other side of her bed to take down the other side of her hair. "Is that why you think you can't wear these stupid buns anymore?" 

She looked at her hands. "I'm not a virgin anymore now, I can't wear white gowns anymore either." 

Han sighed sitting on the edge of her bed. 

She slipped her arms around him and buried her face in his side. 

He sighed holding her. "I'm sorry Leia, I'm so new to Alderaanian customs. I didn't realize your culture was so rigid about stuff like that." 

"But you don't feel that way about me." 

"Nope. I like you no matter what." 

The room comm went off.

Leia sighed. "Someone has found me."  
"Shit, I guess I'll just have to sneak you out of here and onto the Falcon and take you off world to recover." He joked knowing she was much to weak any type of hyperspace travel. 

"I'd love that Han." She sighed. "But you know we can't do that, they'd find us and send Mon Mothma to make us come back." 

"They'd have to find us first." He drawled. "I could take you to the outer rim and we could change our names." 

She smiled at him. "Maybe when I'm healed up a little more." 

The comm buzzed again. 

He kissed the top of her head. "Better answer that your highnessness." 

"Yes?" She answered the comm as Han went back to taking down the other side of her hair. 

"Leia it's Dansa, two things. Luke Skywalker is here to see you if you're up for it. And Mon Mothma is looking for you, now I can't confirm or deny your admittance to the infirmary but she's starting to sound really um... angry." 

"I'll deal with her." Leia sighed. 

"And Captain Skywalker?" Dansa asked. 

"He can visit but I don't want him to have the same access as Han." Leia spoke decisively. "Dansa, no one is to have the same access as Han." 

"Would you like Han listed as family so he can be present for conversations with your medical team concerning your current condition?" Dansa offered. 

"Yes, I would like that very much, thank you." 

"You got it. Um brother, or um..." Dansa cleared her throat. "Significant other?" 

"Well he's certainly not my brother." Leia blushed. 

Han laughed. 

"Significant other then? It's confidential." 

"Sure." 

"This is quite a step your highnessness." Han joked. "Shall I buy you dinner first?" 

Leia and Dansa both laughed. 

"She can eat solid food, well sorta solid, soups and broths." 

Han raised an eyebrow at her. 

"Would you like me to escort Captain Skywalker to your room?" Dansa asked. 

"Yes please." Leia answered. 

"Be right there."

"Thank you Dansa." 

Han brushed Leia's hair from her forehead and she closed her eyes and just enjoyed it. 

"Feel good." He spoke gently. 

"Mmm hmm." 

"Want me to stop when Luke comes in? He might get ideas." 

"Let him, I'm tired of him shooting long looks at me like he wants to ask me out on a date." Leia sighed. 

"Not interested in the young Jedi?" Han teased. 

She turned her nose up. "I grew up a long time ago Han, Luke, regardless of his chronological age is way too young for me." 

He smiled at her. "And I'm way too old." 

"I think you're just about right." Leia reached back and put her hand on his knee. 

"I thought you might." He spoke skeptically. 

"Is that a problem?" 

"I'm not complaining." He kissed her temple and went back to brushing her hair and she went back to enjoying it. "You want me to scram when Mon Mothma shows up?" 

"Absolutely not, you saved my life... twice. She needs to see that and she needs to see that you're taking care of me." 

Dansa walked in with Luke. 

"Hey kid." Han greeted him still brushing Leia's hair. 

"Han." 

Leia opened her eyes and smiled at him. "Thank you Dansa." 

"You're welcome, comm if you need anything." 

"I will." 

"Han?" Dansa turned to him. 

"Yes Dansa?" 

"Will you be buying her dinner or do I need to come back and take her dinner order." 

Han laughed. "Well, if Luke can hang out for a bit I might make her dinner." 

Leia raised her eyebrows. "Han?" 

"Yes?" 

"That doesn't get you out of your deal." 

"I know, you said after." He sighed. 

Leia smiled. "Dansa?" 

"Yes?" Dansa turned back to her. 

"Did you speak with Mon Mothma?" 

"No, not yet." 

"Could you and then let me know if she is coming up here directly? Han needs to be here when she is here." 

"I'll do that right now." Dansa assured her. 

"Thank you Dansa." 

"You're welcome. Do you need anything else while I am here?" 

"Can I drink caff?" Leia asked as if it were the most important question in the galaxy. 

"Yes." 

"I would love some caff." 

"I'll bring a full service for you, and your visitors. I assume that Mon Mothma will be along shortly after I call her back." 

Leia nodded. "Thank you." 

"Oh." Dansa turned just before leaving the room. "Han, do you have a data pad with you?" 

"Yes." 

"May I see it? I know that Leia is not informed of much and now that we have you properly listed in our system I can flash everything to you data pad and the two of you can use it to keep up with her progress, treatments and medication schedule, as well as any procedures that have been done or will be done." 

"That would be great." Han spoke. 

"Once it's been flashed it will automatically update and send you alerts to any changes." Dansa explained. 

Luke stared at them after Dansa had left. "What's going on here?" 

"What?" Han asked sectioning Leia's hair. 

Luke furrowed his eyebrows. "I didn't think you liked each other." 

Han leaned over and looked at Leia. 

She shrugged. "You need some practice Jedi farm boy." 

Han kept his mouth shut and braided her hair. He could tell she was not very comfortable in her current position. 

"They way you two go after each other..."

"I like the way we spar." He spoke getting up. 

"Are you finished?" Leia breathed, the pain starting to really get to her. 

"No. I didn't grab everything I needed." He picked up one of the bags he'd come in with and walked back over. 

"This isn't very comfortable for me. It pulls on whatever incision I have." She spoke gritting her teeth

"I know sweetheart, I can tell. I'm trying." He spoke finishing up. "I'm a little rusty. I haven't braided hair since Jaina." 

"Who's Jaina? Ex of yours Han?" 

Han looked at Luke for a moment and went back to tying a strip of leather at the base of her braid. He cleared his throat and got up. "Don't sit back yet, I got you something." 

"Quit buying me things Han." 

"You lost everything, I can't help but make sure you have a few comforts." He spoke unfolding a colorful Yavini kimono. 

Luke watched how gentle he was with her as he helped her put the soft silk on over her infirmary gown. "Did you two know each other before?" 

Han nodded. 

Leia looked at him. 

"Oh." He took something from his pocket. 

"Han..."

"No, this is yours, I found it on the Falcon." He held it out to her. "Remember? I bet my ship and you bet the necklace your father gave you when you were elected as a junior Senator?" 

"Sabacc." She spoke looking at the Alderaanian sapphire pendant. 

He nodded opening the clasp and putting it on for her, back around her neck where it belonged. "I should have just given it back to you then." She smiled at him, they'd been playing at being lovers for the last year, but the age difference had kept Han from doing anything more than spending time with her. 

"Wait, wait, wait." 

Leia looked at Luke. 

"You play Sabacc?" 

"Kid, she's one of the best Sabacc players I've ever run across. I almost lost the Falcon to her." He had lost the Falcon to her on several occasions passing the time in hyperspace in the crew hold. 

"That?" She laughed. "That rat fuck of a freighter?" 

"Yeah, now you got your necklace back and free use of the Falcon." 

Luke raised his eyebrows at Leia's free use of such harsh language. 

"Han?" She breathed. 

"Yeah?" He spoke gently and even Luke could hear the concern in his voice. 

"Can you help me lie back a little?" 

He slipped his hand under her shoulder blades as he lowered the head of her bed. "Tell me when." 

She nodded. "That's good." She breathed. "That's better." 

"You just rest, I'll entertain Luke." 

"I'm okay." She assured him. "I just hurt." 

"We'll ask Dansa if you can have something for pain." He stroked her cheek. 

"Not until Mon Mothma has been here and gone. I'm not letting her use that against me." 

"Want me to look and see what's going on under there?" Han spoke gently. 

She nodded. "Be respectful." 

He laughed a little. 

Luke watched Leia watch Han. He couldn't believe she trusted him enough to let him see her naked. 

"Uh, Luke?" Han looked at him just before he lifted Leia's infirmary gown. "Want to move around a bit?" 

Luke cleared his throat and walked around the other side of the bed. 

"Luke?" Leia reached her hand out to him. "Come here." She spoke taking his hand. 

"Gods." Han mumbled looking at Leia's battered body. 

"What?" She spoke through gritted teeth, the cool air in the room against the incisions from her emergency procedure made them hurt more. 

"Well I see where they cut you open to put in a chest tube and the place where they opened you up to put mesh in to stabilize your ribs on this side but you have a huge incision down the middle. They said you were bleeding internally and they had to use a lot of units of blood to stabilize you. I guess they went in after the bleed and it took them a while to find it." 

"See anything else?" She spoke through her teeth. 

He shook his head, he lied he couldn't speak as he looked at the deep dark bruising on the inside of her thighs and Leia saw it all over his face. He tucked her back in. "It's going to be a long road." He spoke, his voice tight in his throat. He looked at her and saw her as the fifteen year old girl he'd gotten Court Martialed, tortured and almost executed over. He saw the strong willed baby faced junior Senator from Alderaan she'd been the first time they'd encountered each other and he'd been sent to torture and rape her and instead jettisoned her in an escape pod. He'd been too late to save her this time. He wiped his eyes and cleared his throat. "I um, I'm gong to see how Dansa is coming with that caff service and if Mon Mothma will be gracing us with her presence." He kissed cheek and let himself out. 

"Is he alright?" Luke spoke after Han had stepped out. 

"No."

"There's more history between the two of you than you're letting on." 

Leia sighed. "He was Court Martialed when he was an Imperial Fleet Admiral." 

"He was a Fleet Admiral?" 

She nodded. "He was well on his way to becoming the youngest Grand Moff ever promoted." 

"What happened?" Luke marveled at the idea of the smuggler he knew as a high ranking Imperial officer. 

"I happened." Leia spoke flatly. "When I was fifteen." 

Luke furrowed his eyebrows at her. 

"I was a junior Senator and the perfect spy and my ship was captured between Couruscant and Alderaan. Han was the Fleet Admiral. Tarkin was his commanding officer and he sent him to torture me. Tarkin's idea of torturing female prisoners always involves rape. Han couldn't do it. He sneaked me food and sat with me, instead of torturing me he comforted me and when he got the chance he sneaked me into an escape pod with the long range commlink he was using to send information to the Alliance and jettisoned me off his destroyer. It blew his cover and he was almost executed. He escaped in a stolen tie fighter and then showed up on Alderaan a year later running freight for my father and ran into me hustling Sabacc in a dive bar in the Moccoan district of Aldera City. Every time he'd drop a shipment he'd find me and we'd smoke a little rank weed and just be near each other, sometime we didn't even talk. The time we spent together on his destroyer bonded us to each other and just his presence was soothing to me. He knew about this mission and he knew how scared I was and he's kicking himself for not getting to me sooner. He knows what I went through on the Death Star and he was able to save me from it the first time, but not this time and it's killing him." 

"So you're lovers." Luke guessed. 

She shook her head. "Not right now, no. After what happened to me on the Death Star, I'm not sure I'll ever be able to..." She cleared her throat. "It's going to be a long road." 

"But you love him?" 

She nodded. "I've loved him for a long time." 

"He certainly loves you." 

She nodded. "He wishes I was older." 

Luke laughed.


	3. Falcon

"Captain Solo." Mon Mothma spoke. "Or shall I say, General." She dropped his cover rank for his official rank. 

"Ma'am." Han stood up straight and saluted. 

"How is she?" Mon Mothma took his hand in both of hers, warmly with purpose and even comfort, which was rare for the Chancellor. She tried to convey her condolences for everything, the mission, the mess, the catastrophic loss and for Leia. 

He shook his head. "She'll live but she'll never be the same Leia we knew before." 

"But she remembers who you are." 

He nodded. "Of course she does, her mind is surprisingly intact. I mean, I know Vader was probably in there poking around, looking for information. I've seen him drive people to madness, but Leia's mind is her own and as sharp as ever." 

"Good." Mon Mothma encouraged him watching his shoulders drop. "That's wonderful news." 

Han nodded. "I didn't get there in time Mon." He shook his head, they should have never split up, he should have never trusted a crew with her safety. They should have never split off on Scarif, they should have taken the Falcon to Tatooine to find Kenobi together. He could have protected her, he and Chewie could have out maneuvered the Destroyer that took her captive. He'd never trust a crew with her safety again. 

"You saved her life, you got her out." Mon Mothma tried again to lift his spirits. 

He shook his head. "Not in time, not like last time." 

"You did your best." 

He nodded not wanting to talk about it anymore. "She's afraid you won't approve of me." He changed the subject. 

Mon Mothma smiled. "She forgets that you and her are not a new thing and that I have my own Corellian at home." 

"How is Crix?" 

"He's working too much, hopefully having you with us on the record will take some pressure off of him." 

Han nodded. "Do you think he'd mind getting my shifts covered while she's here? I don't want to leave her." 

"Already done, as soon as Dansa called me back I handled it." 

"Thanks." 

Dansa approached with coffee service and smiled. "Captain, could you get the door for me?" 

"Sure." He placed his palm on the biometric scanner. 

"I've updated your data pad as well." She spoke as the door unlocked. 

"Thank you." 

"It's a lot Captain, it's going to take her a while to come back from this." 

He nodded waiving Dansa and Mon Mothma in. 

"Your Highness." Mon Mothma spoke bowing slightly before moving to embrace her gently. 

"Mon Mothma you've known me since I was just a child, I don't call you Chancellor you don't have to call me Your Highness." 

She smiled at her. "I was almost your mother." 

Leia smiled watching Mon Mothma look at the bruises and signs of torture that were visible. 

"Why didn't you tell me the truth?" 

Leia shook her head slowly looking down at her hands. She couldn't even tell Han, how could she have been expected to tell the debriefing team from High Command, the friends of her father. 

Mon Mothma nodded taking her hand. Now wasn't the time to chastise Leia for keeping her trauma to herself in a debriefing full of men, she needed to be there for her, to be the mother that she wanted so desperately to be for Leia when she and Crix had been considered by Kenobi to take her and raise her. 

"I don't know if I'll ever be able to tell anyone everything. You can get the gist of what happened from my medical records. Dansa loaded them onto Han's data pad. If we ever get to the point that we're holding tribunals I'll do the best I can." 

"We'll deal with that when the times comes." Mon Mothma sat down. 

Leia nodded. 

"I'll sit with you." Han spoke sitting on the edge of her infirmary bed and taking her hand in both of his. 

She nodded resting her head against his shoulder as he slipped his arm around her. 

"Tired?" 

She nodded. "I just hurt Han." 

"It's time for your meds." Dansa spoke serving caff. "Would you like them now, or would you like to wait for you visitors to leave?" 

"I'd like them now, please." 

"Sure thing, I'll be right back." 

"Well." Mon Mothma spoke sipping her caff. "You seem to be handling her care very well Han." 

He nodded. "I was going to make her something to eat now that they're letting her have soup, but I don't really want to leave her alone." 

Luke looked at his chrono. "I can't stay it's time for my guard shift." He got up. "I'll be back tomorrow." 

Leia smiled at him. "Comm first, I might have you bring in some contraband." 

"Sure thing." He hugged her gently and walked around to hug Han. 

"Take good care of her Han." 

Han nodded. 

"I think it might be time to rotate the Princess out of this assignment." Han spoke sending her medical records to Mon Mothma's data pad. "I think this last mission should be the end of her illustrious and highly decorated black ops career." He spoke kicking off his boots and getting more comfortable on her bed so that she could sleep on him once Dansa returned with her meds. 

"Han?" Leia spoke quietly. 

"Yeah?" He moved to look at her, to make sure that she was alright. 

"Take off your holster." She sat back. 

He took his holster off and hung it on her bed rail. "Better?" 

She nodded curling back up with him. 

Mon Mothma smiled at them together, she'd been anticipating their relationship for longer than she was comfortable with. "You know your father approved of Han." 

Leia looked at her. "He never told me that." 

"He was quite fond of him. The age difference bothered him for a while but the older you got the more okay he got with it." 

"We're not officially together..." Han started. 

"You might not have been before, but you certainly are now." 

Han nodded. 

"I think that any of us that saw you together knew it was inevitable." 

"Bail really would have been okay with this?" Han spoke quietly after Leia had fallen asleep once her meds had kicked in. 

"Yes." Mon Mothma spoke just above a whisper. "He trusted you with her and hoped that one day you'd work up the nerve to ask after her." 

Han nodded. "Gods, it doesn't feel real that they're all gone." 

Mon Mothma nodded. "I know how close you were to the royal family, especially to Bail and Leia." 

"I don't know how I kept it together when we came out of hyperspace into the graveyard. I didn't know where she was, I didn't know if she'd... I thought... I... Thing is, I didn't know she was alive until we got tractor beamed into the Death Star and the Artoo unit she had with her on the Tantive found her in the brig slated for execution. I was so convinced it was fake, Luke had to talk me into going in after her. Gods, when I saw her run down that corridor with Luke all I wanted to do was hold her, but we had to keep our cover and we were being fired on. She rescued herself because I was so beside myself that I... I choked." 

"General Han Solo, expert tactician." Leia mumbled. 

"Brat." Han ribbed her gently. 

She smiled. "Hot shot." 

"Primadonna." 

"Love you, nerfhearder." 

"I know you do, highnessness." 

She moved to a more comfortable position, Han's body was too warm and sitting up the way she had been made her incision burn

Mon Mothma smiled at them. "You want to go to your apartment and make her something to eat while she's resting?" 

"Will you stay with her?" 

Mon Mothma nodded. "Bail and Breha may have adopted her but Crix and I were next on the list." 

"She'll need you two now that all of this has happened." Han looked at her. 

Mon Mothma nodded. "I know." 

"I'll have Dansa come in and set you up as a family member like she did with me so you can come and go." 

"Thank you." She spoke watching him get up carefully without waking Leia. 

"And my apartment is?" He spoke fastening his holster. 

Mon Mothma sent the information for the location and lock code for he and Leia's quarters on base. "Chewbacca has been moving the two of you in today."

"Both of us?" Han raised an eyebrow at her. 

"I hope I didn't overstep, she's not going to be able to take care of herself very well for a while..."

Han cut her off. "You didn't know that before." 

"Losing everyone, Han you know the nightmares are going to start soon. You know as well as I do she won't be able to live alone and cope." 

Han nodded watching her sleep for a moment. "She told me earlier that part of her wished I hadn't come for her." 

Mon Mothma looked at him, her diplomatic training and years of service had never prepared her for this. "I'm sorry." 

He sighed. "She'll get better. It's just going to take time." 

"And you, it's going to take a lot from all of us who love her."

He nodded stroking her cheek as she slept. "Leia?" 

She looked at him with unfocused eyes. 

"I'll be back in a little while, Mon's going to stay with you while I'm gone." 

She smiled and reached out and mussed his hair. "Where are you going?" She spoke thickly. 

He laughed. "Making you dinner." 

"Still not part of our agreement, Solo." 

"I know... after." 

She smiled and fell back asleep. 

"Your agreement?" Mon Mothma looked over her data pad at him. 

"I told her that if I wasn't the first thing she saw when she woke up that I would stay on base for three standard months. No, black ops missions, no freighting. She woke up to the ceiling, so our agreement stands." 

Mon Mothma laughed. "I like it." 

"Honestly, as bad off as she is... I like it too. I'm worried about long term mental stuff once she starts healing physically." 

"Suicide?" Mon Mothma felt her her chest tighten, just because Leia was alive now didn't necesarily mean that she had survived all of her injuries. She'd thought about the possibility but she'd kept it at a distance until Han had hinted at it. She watched him watch Leia sleep for a moment and her heart ached for him. 

He nodded. "Stress response, hopelessness, night terrors, trauma response, ideation, regret, guilt. I could go on." 

Mon Mothma nodded. "That's why I overstepped a bit and moved her in with you." 

"Thanks." 

Chewbacca lowed at Han when he let himself into he and Leia's new quarters. (How is she?)

"Who?" 

(Leia, the Princess?)

"Who told you?" 

(Mon Mothma, and the kid.)

Han nodded. "She'll live, but she's real beat up."

(Can I visit?)

"Sure, I came here to shower and shave and make her food." 

(What food?)

"Soup for now." 

(Go get cleaned up. I'll make her soup.)

"She does love your cooking." 

He lowed. 

Han smiled. "Be back." 

Han walked into the space port wearing his Alderaanian military uniform and bars.

"General Solo." General Rieekan greeted him. 

"General Rieekan."

"How are you Han?" 

"Making it, Carlist, how are you?" 

"Trying to cope." 

Han nodded. "Aren't we all?" 

He nodded. "How's our Princess." 

"Resting after surgery. They had to take her spleen and reconstruct the structure of her ribs on her left side. She'll recover in time, but it's going to take a while." 

He nodded. 

"How's she doing with Alderaan?" 

"We haven't discussed it much, she's in pretty rough shape and they've got her pretty well medicated." 

Rieekan nodded. "You certainly look better." 

"She told me I was looking scruffy, thought I'd clean up a bit." Han shrugged. "She's still Leia." 

Rieekan laughed. "She was right." 

Han laughed. 

"I'd like to visit when she's up for it." Rieekan's tone softened. 

"I think that'd be good, the two of you could probably benefit from getting together to deal with this ordeal." 

"I think that might be healing for both of us." Rieekan reflected. 

"How likely is it that anyone got off." Han spoke cutting right to the point. 

"We sent a transmission to Bail that Leia was captured and he would have had enough time to assemble a crew and get off the planet. The last I heard from Bail is that he was doing just that. We think he might be alive." 

Han nodded. 

"Don't tell Leia unless we find him." Rieekan cautioned. 

Han nodded. "Keep me up to date." 

"I will Han." Rieekan spoke, his voice taking on a more meaningful tone. 

Luke stared at him. "Han?" 

"What's up kid?" Han walked over to him at his data station. 

"How did you go from smuggler to General." Luke looked at the bars on his uniform. 

"Long story kid." Han spoke ribbing the kid just a little. 

Luke rolled his eyes. 

"Carlist." Han turned back to Rieekan. "I need to borrow Skywalker." 

Rieekan nodded. 

"Come on." 

"What uniform is that?" Luke asked as they sat down together in the base Cantina. 

"Alderaanian Military." 

"Leia told me about your Court Martial." 

Han nodded. "She didn't tell you that after that I went to work for the Alderaanian Military, black ops." 

"She said you were a freighter and that you kept her in rank weed." 

Han laughed. "Freighting was our cover." 

"Our?" 

"We were mission partners, we played a lot of Sabacc and smoked a lot of rank weed, in the crew hold of the Falcon or it's sister ship the Halcon on the way to gather intel on the Empire while running freight with a crew as cover." 

"Leia's black ops?" Luke marveled. 

Yeah kid, since that incident on my destroyer. I've been by her side for the last three years." 

"What the hell were you doing on Tatooine?" 

"That was our rendezvous point after she got the Death Star plans. We were supposed to meet at Mos Eisley and go find Obi Wan to locate you. She'd commed me as they were being tractor beamed into the Vader's flagship. She told me that she'd jettisoned the Artoo unit and 3PO. That Artoo would find Obi Wan and to stay put and the droid would bring Kenobi to the rendezvous point. Kenobi knew to look for a Bloodstriped Corellian and a Wookiee in the cantina. If the Princess and I didn't make it to his place together." 

"How?" Luke marveled. 

"Kenobi had a long range commlink." Han shrugged. "Bail commed him." 

"So when I showed up with Artoo he knew that something must have happened to Leia."

Han nodded. "When you walked into that Cantina with Kenobi and the droids, even though I'd talked to her... I had to assume she was dead." 

"I'm sorry." Luke looked at the table. 

"That's why I was so reluctant to go to the prison level to chase a ghost. I'd just assumed once they pulled in the Falcon they set a trap for us by using Leia as bait." He took a long drink of his ale, gods it hurt just to think about it. 

"Gods what must have gone through your mind when she and I ran up that corridor." 

"I choked, that's why she had to take over the rescue mission." 

Luke laughed. "She sure showed you." 

"Luke." Han looked at him with sincerity. "I was a few weeks away from going to Bail and asking after her and suddenly he and their entire planet, a planet that I had started to call home was obliterated and I assumed that Leia was dead too and here she is alive and well. I couldn't believe my eyes." 

"So was your cover story to not know each other?" 

"In the presence of Imperials, sure. We didn't want to take any risks. I grew my hair out and scruffed myself up and became Han Solo Captain of the Millennium Falcon smuggler and rogue and she jumped right back into being Princess Leia of Alderaan, House of Organa, Daughter of Viceroy Bail and Queen Breha. A well respected Senator in the Imperial Senate on a diplomatic mission, not the black ops agent who'd been living on the Falcon in hyperspace for three years tracking Jyn Erso and the Death Star plans her father the designer had hidden away. We parted ways on Scarif to cover our tracks and she was captured almost right away."  
__________________

Han shut the cockpit door after Luke had wandered off to spend some time alone.

"Hi." Leia got up and walked over to him. 

He smiled at her taking her into his arms. "That hair." He spoke poking one of the buns on the side of her head. 

"You don't like it?" 

He laughed. "You definitely took innocent Princess to heart, white desert gown virginal Revolutionary Buns... I don't know princess, I haven't seen you dressed like this in a very long time. Not sure I like it." 

She smiled at him. "I'll change into something a little less innocent when we get to the base." 

He smiled at her. "It's alright, not going to complain, you're alive." 

"I am."

"I thought you were dead." He spoke his eyes full of concern and emotion as he stroked her cheek. "And then I saw you and I... I choked."

"You were great. You kept our cover flawlessly." She shook her head pressing her hand to his chest, feeling his heartbeat under her palm, it was racing. She had a feeling his heart had been racing since he'd seen her alive on the Death Star. "I am apparently hard to kill." She slipped her arms around his neck pulling him down to her as she pressed the length of her body against him, holding his eyes and parting her lips, inviting him to kiss her.

He took the invitation kissed her gently. "I'm never trusting a crew with you again. This is the last mission you go on without me." 

"I'm fine with that, as long as I can sleep in your bunk." 

He smiled at her. "You'll be lucky if you ever leave my bunk after we get back to the fleet." He spoke kissing her again. 

Han shook himself from his memories. She'd had to have been in so much pain during those stolen moments on the Falcon. He hated that she'd been covering up for him. "So you asked me what I had on you, when it came to Leia, you know now." 

Luke nodded. "Everything." 

Han nodded. "Listen, you're a data officer when you're not flying, right?" 

"Yeah." Luke looked up, happy to hear the conversation shift. 

"Got your data pad on you?" 

Luke nodded. 

"I'm going flash some classified information to you. I want you to work on something for me, for Leia and all of the living Alderaanians." 

"Anything." Luke promised. 

"That first file is the image of the House Organa SOS beacon. Now, you see that bird in the corner." 

"Yeah." Luke squinted. 

"That's how you know it's not counterfeit. That bird is a Falcon." 

"Like the Millennium Falcon?" 

"It's so Leia or I can verify it. It's Leia's royal symbol." 

"You named your ship after her?" 

"That's our ship and yeah I did." Han corrected. 

Luke nodded. 

"I want you to watch for that, scan systems for it. There's a chance Bail got out. The next file is a clip of Leia speaking her native languages."

"There's more than one?" Luke marveled. 

He nodded. "The first file is Moccoan an indigenous language the second is Druianse, it's ceremonial. Memorize how they sound and listen for them, they are often used by operatives to send messages, very few people outside of Alderaan and even most Alderaanians don't speak them and can't translate them." 

Luke nodded. 

"The third file is Bail and I having a conversation in Basic so you can hear his accent. There is also a conversation between he and Leia in Moccoan and Druianse. The last file is Leia talking with her adopted sister Winter and her mother Breha so you know their voices as well." 

Luke nodded. 

"That's classified stuff kid, so if you find anything any time of day you find me and I'll handle it." Han got up. 

"You got it Han." 

"If I can find Leia's father and bring him home to her, you don't know how much that would mean to her and the other survivors." 

Luke nodded. "Is there a chance he left the planet in time?" 

"According to Carlist, yes." 

Luke nodded. 

"I've got to get back to Leia, Chewie's made her favorite soup and is taking it to her at the infirmary and Mon Mothma needs to get back to work." 

Luke nodded. 

"You hear anything that sounds like any of that you call me." 

Han let himself into Leia's infirmary room with some Yanvini flowers. They weren't her favorite, Alderaanian star flowers, but they were similar in color and scent. She stopped talking to Mon Mothma and smiled at him. "Don't you look handsome." 

Chewbacca lowed at him. (You've been gone too long cub.)

"I needed to discuss something with Luke." Han spoke sitting down with Leia. "How are you?" 

"I'm okay." She spoke moving close to him, drawn in by the warmth of his body. "I ate a little." 

(Not enough.) Chewbacca corrected. 

"Enough for now." Leia assured the concerned Wookiee. 

Han kissed her temple and felt her relax. 

"I think I'm going to go for now, check in with High Command and give a report of Leia's condition." Mon Mothma got up. "Nothing detailed, just to let them know that she's stable." She assured Leia gently. 

Leia nodded without opening her eyes. 

"Chewbacca, why don't you walk with me? It's getting late." 

Chewbacca lowed at her and got up. 

Han watched him walk carefully around the foot of the med bunk, avoiding the monitors and IVs and all of the machines that were keeping Leia alive. He wrapped his furry arms around her and held her tight. (Rest little princess, let the cub take care of you.)

She nodded. "I'll be alright." 

"I'll comm if we need anything Chewie." Han assured him. 

Han changed out of his Alderaanian uniform and into his shorts at undershirt before getting into Leia's infirmary bed after Mon Mothma and Chewbacca had left for the evening. Leia ran her fingers through the hair at his temples. 

"What's wrong?" She spoke looking deep into his eyes. 

"I had a lot of friends on Alderaan, Leia and your family was really starting to become my family too. This isn't as hard for me as it is for you and Carlist but it's not easy either." 

Leia kissed him. "We have each other at least." 

He nodded taking the kiss over and slipping his arms around her careful of her numerous injuries. 

"You taste like spiced ale." She spoke through the kiss. 

"I took Luke to the cantina and explained a few things to him." He kissed her neck. 

"Easy." Leia breathed. "I know you missed me, but I'm real sore." 

He moved onto his side and looked at her. "I'm sorry." He stroked her cheek. "I didn't mean to hurt you." 

She smiled at him. "You didn't, but we were getting there quick." She watched his eyes soften. "It's just going to take time." 

He nodded. 

She kissed him gently. "Be patient with me." 

He smiled at her. "You just tell me what you need." 

"You, I just need you." 

He kissed her forehead. "I'll be right here every step."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The Falcon insignia fanon comes into play in this chapter, it is not my own I believe it belongs to Madame Alexandra.


	4. Clean

Several days later Han supported Leia as she got used to walking with the nerve damage that some of the more brutal torture had caused her. She had a lot of unexplained damage to her back and her spinal cord. It was as if someone had crumpled her up like a piece of paper. This was why it hurt when he gently pressed his hand against the small of her back in the marketplace. 

"I don't know how I got through the Death Star to the Falcon with you and Luke. It's just so hard to walk." She spoke gripping Han's hand for stability. 

"I think it got worse over time, I think the dive into the garbage chute probably made everything worse." Han spoke gently gripping her hip as she faltered. "You might have to use a hover chair for a while Leia." 

She nodded. 

"That was nice of Dansa to offer to help out at our place once you discharge." 

Leia nodded. "She's Alderaanian." 

"I thought she might be." 

She nodded watching Dansa watch her walk with Han. 

"I still think you need a hover chair, this is a pretty long base." 

"You could carry me." 

Han laughed. "I could." 

"Have you slept at the apartment here yet?" She spoke, stopping to rest her body burning with damaged nerve endings. She leaned against his chest and let him hold her, let him take her weight, what was left of it, for a while. 

"I've taken a nap there, why?" He spoke keeping his voice light, fighting against the urge to break. Seeing her like this destroyed him, but he didn't want to let her see that. She wasn't ready to know how much he blamed himself, blamed her father. If Bail Organa had indeed lived, he and Han would be having a very intense conversation about putting Leia in such a dangerous position. 

"Is the bed comfortable. I mean, I think I'll be spending a lot of time there and on the sofa for a while." She spoke listening to gentle reassuring rhythm of his heart beating in his chest. 

"It's great, Mon Mothma really outdid herself. The whole place is really nice, it reminds me of your apartment on Coruscant." 

She looked at him. 

"I mean it's nice like that, you know?" 

She nodded. 

He kissed her temple. "I keep forgetting that we can't just go home." 

"Me too." 

"I'm sorry." 

She shook her head and started walking again. "Our sorrows won't bring them back." 

He nodded. 

"It won't be as hard for us as it will be for Carlist, he lost his wife. We have each other." 

He nodded as they made the turn around at the end of the hall. "You ready to go back." 

She nodded. "I need to lie down." 

"Still takes a lot out of you, doesn't it?" 

She nodded. 

"It'll get better." He spoke, gently tucking her agianst his side, his arm wrapped tightly around her waist holding her tight in case she faultered as her body weakened from over use. 

"You alright in there?" Han asked through the fresher door of her infirmary suite. He'd started the shower for her and left her to it. It had been a few minutes and the shower was just running. 

Leia examined the bruises and surgical repairs on her body in the bathroom mirror, this had been her first real ambulatory day and it was really the first time she'd been able to look at herself. She was surprised at the amount of dried blood that the medics had left behind on her skin. 

"Leia?" 

"I don't know." 

"Can I come in?" 

"Yes." 

Han let himself in. “Lei?” 

She sighed and shook her head. 

"What's going on?" He spoke carefully, his voice taking on a gentle, non-patronizing tone. 

"Look at me, Han." 

"You're beautiful, what's the matter?” 

“I don’t need you to lie to me.” 

“I’m not lyin’ sweetheart.” He spoke cupping her shoulders. “Wouldn’t do that to you.” 

She looked down at the bruises yellowing around the edges, the surgical repairs covered in bacta seals, and the dried blood, the dried blood that seemed to just be everywhere. "How can you think I'm beautiful when I look like this now?" 

He sighed pulling her close and letting her curl her body in close to his. He ran his hand over the ceremonial tattoos that only he had seen, distorted by a scan grid and whatever else they’d used to mark and burn her body. Permanent reminders of just what she’d lost, what they’d both lost at the hands of the Empire. He just held her pretending not to feel her hot tears soaking through his shirt, holding her as tight as her still unhealed body would allow. “S’alright Lei.” He spoke gently. “S’gonna be alright.” 

She nodded. 

"Leia." He spoke stripping down to his shorts. "You're alive, and all of this will heal. M’not goin’ no where.” 

She nodded. 

"Come on. I'll wash your hair." He spoke gently, his fingers getting caught in places as he ran them through its length. 

She nodded, her hair was a disaster, oily from remaining unwashed for so long, matted down in places from not being allowed out of bed, and worse it was stiff in places from her own blood and from the gifts that the stormtroopers had left her during her time on the Death Star. Enough that she had, had the rather morbid sarcastic thought that she could start her own clone troopers with all of the biological material left in her hair. 

Han helped her into the shower and helped her sit down on the shower chair Dansa had brought amid her protests that she could stand long enough to shower. She couldn’t, and she was thankful that her protests had been ignored. She sat letting the hot water pour down onto her body. Gods, it felt so good, even in the places it stung. She watched the rust colored water collect in the shower pan and swirl down the drain, ‘finally’ she thought, without the constant smell of copper that her body had taken on, she might be able to begin to move forward. Her thoughts were interrupted by Han stepping into the shower behind her with his shorts on. 

She turned to look over her shoulder at him. "You going to leave your shorts on?" 

"I'd planned to, yeah." 

"It wouldn't bother me if you didn't." 

He took of his shorts now soaked, and tossed them the short distance into the sink. “Better, princess?” 

She raised her eyebrows at him. 

"What?" 

"I'd always assumed that was where your confidence came from." 

Han laughed. "Very funny your highnessness." He spoke washing her hair. 

"I thought it was a compliment." 

"What are you trying to say?" 

"You're a very large man Han, I'm not surprised by that. In fact I'd assumed that you might have been all along." 

He laughed. “Wasn’t expecting your to be so direct.” 

Leia laughed at herself as Han scrubbed her scalp with his finger tips. 

"Oh that's nice." She almost purred. She hadn't washed her hair in weeks, since before their ill-fated mission to Tatooine. 

"Good?" 

"Mmm hmmm, so good Han." 

Han cleared his throat and stepped back a bit annoyed with his body’s response to their close proximity and Leia’s vocal enjoyment of having her hair washed. . 

"What?" 

"Nothing." He spoke rinsing the soap out of her hair. 

She stood up to wash her body and looked down. "He's very responsive, isn't he?" She spoke noticing his erection. 

"I’m sorry." 

She smiled at him and he was relieved by her grace. 

"Gods." Leia spoke sitting in bed as Han braided her hair. "I'm always surprised how much a real water shower makes everything better." 

He smiled at her in one of his old shirts. "Remind me never to buy you a night gown." 

"If I weren’t in this infirmary, I'd be naked." She spoke wryly. 

He raised his eyebrow at her glad to see that she was feeling well enough to flirt with him. "Are you just trying to make me suffer?" 

She smiled mischievously. "I don’t know what you mean?" 

"I don't know Princess Blue Balls? What do you think I mean?" He spoke without thinking as he wrapped an elastic around the end of her braid. 

She laughed. "General, get in this bed with me." 

"Is that an order, your highness?" 

"Yes." 

He got under the covers with her. "Are you pulling rank?" 

"Yes." She spoke kissing his chin. "I am." 

"I like that more than I should right now." 

She kissed him. "Did you just call me Princess Blue Balls?" 

"I did.” He shook his head. “I’m sorry, I went too far, I shouldn't have." 

"This isn't entirely my fault, you the one that wanted to wait until I was in my twenties." 

"I was afraid your father would have had me castrated." 

"He wouldn't have." 

"Well I didn't know that did I?" 

She sighed kissing his chest. "It's not a concern now." 

"What if he lived Leia?" 

She stopped and looked at him. "What?" 

"Carlist said that once the Alliance sent the signal that you had been captured by Vader's flagship he was supposedly putting together an away team to rescue you. I have Luke working on it, classified of course."


End file.
